As soon as I decided to own my Queenhood, I received a test from the Universe.

To see if I was serious.

The test was a great conversation with a man on Bumble…and at midnight, of all times! I was busy writing my notes when he started messaging me on the app (a welcome distraction, I have to say…those EMR notes kill me)!

We had a great rhythm going-sharing some funny and serious stories. He was definitely piquing my interest!

He had a long thesis about why MA was the best state to be in and made me really stop and wonder if I ever thought so deeply about why I continued to live in MA. No, I really hadn’t. But I have since. More on that, maybe, at another time!

In any event, he wanted to call. It was 12:23 AM and I laughed, thinking ‘sure, why not’, needing to make sure it wasn’t a booty call!

It wasn’t.

It was actually a lot of fun…and we ended up setting up a date!

But there were a couple of red flags, the most important one for me being his reaction to his latest dating experience.

He was in a similar 2 date journey with someone a week before but things didn’t work out and he was really sad about it. He was still thinking about her and was working through how he felt (that’s usually my story-the tables were totally turned here)!

I wasn’t too thrilled about that. Considering I had been there myself, it was irony at its best. I saw myself in his mirror but I had already moved on.

He hadn’t.

However I thought our connection was interesting enough that I didn’t judge him and kept our date.

Until today.

He texted me today (one day went by in between our phone call), telling me he was feeling better.

I was confused. Feeling better? As in from the break-up? Yep.

So, I asked him if he was really ready to meet someone else and date if he’s still getting over this woman. I was clear that I didn’t want to be compared to another woman and more importantly, I wanted him to be able to be 100% present, as I would be.

He understood-his ability to be honest was really awesome and that part was really heartwarming. We agreed to forego our upcoming date. He wanted to know if he could reach out after Thanksgiving. ‘Sure’, I said, ‘If I’m still single’!

Because deep down I believe I will not be!

And, no sooner than I said that, I received a new like on Bumble.

From a man who was a quick communicator, unlike most on Bumble. We had immediate rhythm! He is a positive thinker and like me, looks at glasses half full! If there’s shit, he’ll find gold. YES!!

And he wanted to talk, so we got on the phone tonight and it was great!

I have put on my crown! @LaylaMartin

And I feel empowered.

It was the first time I actually said no to a man who asked me out. I put myself first and seriously considered what I really wanted without fear!

That is key. No fear. It was authentic and real. I listened to myself. All my manifesting is unfolding in front of my eyes and the magic is real.

Who knows what will happen with this fabulous man I spoke with today, but as you all know, my hope springs eternal and perhaps I won’t be single for long…! And that fucking crown…it’s so shiny you’d be blinded by the light reflected off its magnificent jewels!