I realize I have been silent for a few weeks and want to explain it to you…I think it has to do with geometry…
If you remember, I made a promise to myself that 2021 would be spent manifesting my authenticity!
I ended 2020 with the recognition and welcoming of my bisexuality! Living honestly and declaring all that I am, fearlessly!
But when 2021 began, I didn’t know how that was going to express itself…and I wondered.
We are still in the middle of a pandemic. How the hell am I supposed to figure this out? I don’t want to go online. But I can’t go out, either!
Well, then…I decided to take it on as real self-love.
Feeling this magical fire within!
Letting myself feel turned on simply by knowing that I have so many more I can and want to love.
But more importantly, that I can hold this beautiful light within and be IN LOVE with myself.
And I’ve been doing exactly that.
As you know, if you’ve read my past posts, I have entered an exciting, new phase of my career growth. I decided to become a certified Love, Sex and Relationship coach through the Tantric Institute of Sexuality with Layla Martin. One of the most exciting career transitions I have had yet!
Being a doctor allows me to be with my patients during moments when they share deep and intimate parts of themselves and their lives. Having this additional training will give me a more meaningful approach for them in matters of the heart and soul, spiritually able to guide them deeper and help them unravel complex parts of themselves.
The really cool thing about this program (that is 1.5 yrs of training, by the way-no small joke here) is that we have to work on ourselves, first!
We can’t guide others until we’ve experienced what we are going to offer.
And it’s really deep work.
Soul moving, uncovering of our shadows, celebrating all aspects of our being, understanding and recognizing our sexuality, addressing trauma, holding our inner child, the list goes on and on and I’m only in the 3rd week.
So, with all of this work, I got deep within and realized that I wasn’t able to connect with what my path was going to be in finding a partner. I was busy discovering my own self.
But life being a contradiction in so many ways, I’ve also been so excited about this new founded kundalini energy within that I WANTED to know how I would go about the eventuality of dating a woman and eliminate dating a man or vice versa.
And it felt uncomfortable to have to choose.
But then I discovered something.
Geometry in love.
…let that soak in…
…I don’t have to choose!
I can’t take the credit for that realization, though. A gifted, gorgeous being shared that insight with me and for a moment I felt shocked. How the hell would I do that? HOW??
Until I started feeling excited by it. And realized that I do want that!
OMG. She was right.
Talk about breaking walls!!!
So far from what I thought I wanted. Perhaps that is a part of why I am still here, single. Because I’ve been searching for the wrong thing the whole time. I’ve been looking for a straight line when it really was meant to be a rainbow triangle.
My next series of paintings is going to be be about rainbows and triangles…as I said, Geometry in Love.