It’s said that history repeats itself…and yes, I’m a believer.
We have been experiencing that in so many ways through the COVID-19 pandemic.
Going back to the times when the only way to prevent the spread of the Spanish flu was wearing face masks…a hundred years later, that’s still the only way we’re able to prevent the spread of COVID-19.
School classrooms are going to go back to layouts of the past-they’ll have individual desks spread apart from each other to avoid getting kids sick. Gone are the days of group work around a table.
Fewer people will be traveling by air. In the past that was simply due to exorbitant costs and limited carriers. Now, it will be that plus the issues surrounding lack of physical distancing on a plane.
And one of the great experiences that I am having right now-the resurgence of ROMANCE!
I call it the Romantic Revolution!
Never before have I had the incredible dating encounters I am having today! It’s stuff that dreams and movies are made of…really!
In the olden days, when there were too many miles and multiple layers of family members who served as guards of ones’ pussy between the dame and her suitor, there were no options to meet.
Letters served as ways to communicate affection to another.
And then it was the chaperoned walk. Maybe it was a flirtation here and there, but there was no kiss…!
Today, we make the face mask equal to that chaperone. Something in between those two sets of lips.
Obviously, I wasn’t in this human form a hundred years ago, so I can’t attest to anything I said above…it’s only from reading Charles Dickens and Jane Austen that I can imagine any of that happened.
But I can tell you that right now I am experiencing romance that I never thought could happen.
I dreamed it. I wanted it. I believed it existed. But I had so many interactions over the years that started inserting doubt, so I thought perhaps my head was in the clouds…
Then COVID-19 hit.
The world paused and spun on its axis. And it’s still spinning…with all of us in it. The difference in the past five months on this planet in regards to finding love is more than I would have been able to predict.
If you’ve been keeping up with my blog you’ve read my theories on the gifts of COVID 19 in our world.
The realization of the need for humanity to come together, the importance of communication, the uprising to stand against injustice and bias, the beauty in how our planet has responded to our reduced carbon footprints.
I’ve also talked about how dating has changed and how difficult it is to get to that point of being able to actually meet a love interest.
But, also, how I appreciate the benefit of zoom/tech to speak to someone and not be distracted…how that has improved communication and quality of conversations.
Now, I’m going to take that to a whole new level.
Romance has found its way through a screen that could not have been found before.
Seriously.
In my sixteen years of dating, I haven’t found it easy to really get to know someone.
And the reason is related to one of my earlier blog posts…sex…
During a pandemic, unless you are made of superhuman substance or have an immune system like my alter-ego, getting sick is a high likelihood if you remove the mask and physical distancing.
And as you know I’ve been wondering when the right time is to take that risk.
Well, the cool thing is when you meet someone with a mutual quotient of liking, patience comes into the picture.
Totally contrary to what I initially thought.
I thought not having the ability to kiss, hug, hold hands and have sex would make the experience of getting to know someone trying and impossible.
It’s the exact opposite.
The beauty of time is that we really get to know each other.
Conversations go on for hours and are uninterrupted. Dates become creative and the desire that increases with each moment only makes each date that much more exciting. The dates we’ve had have connected us to each other so much, that I am truly getting to know how he thinks, feels and looks at life and the world.
And we already met a few of each others’ friends. And the biggest one-he met my son!!
In the pre-COVID era the invitation to meet friends and family resulted in a quick escape! Meeting my son was the farthest thought from my mind! And it was also impossible to do easily. With Zoom, things seem so much easier.
Everything feels different now.
There’s a speed to this process that feels faster, yet the oxymoron of that statement is it’s not! It’s all perspective.
In the world of time, this COVID pandemic happened quickly and feels like it’s been here forever. Meeting this man happened as quickly and I feel like I have known him forever, too.
There’s an excitement to living now with the dates we plan.
Sex isn’t even on the table (or in the bed)!
That’s a huge difference.
When you really can’t get physically intimate, you have two choices. Stay and get to know this person and build up the desire-you’ll then explode when you meet. Or leave, because it’s not your cup of tea.
Luckily for us, we are into each other enough to have the patience to endure what this virus is going to give us.
A physical distance date would be way too hard to do when we both would want to get physically close…so we’ve decided it’s better to explore each other through the creative avenues we have in our disposal.
Unlike Jane Austen, we have texting, Zoom and FaceTime. We are in more contact than we would have been had we not been in this pandemic.
In the past, it would have been taken for granted that we’d meet, so we wouldn’t have invested so much in texting/calling/zooming/facetiming. Which means a lot was left unknown. Then we would have met and in that first short coffee/tea/walk we would have decided if we wanted to meet a second time.
No wonder things didn’t work out in my past. There wasn’t enough time being devoted to getting to know each other.
I sent him a love letter today…and as I was putting the care package together, I felt like I was in the Romantic era when this was done with a quill ink-pen, a ribbon in my hair and a spray of my perfume onto the envelope (actually, there is perfume sprayed onto the cards inside, but that’s another story). I’ve never done this before! And the possibility of recreating a time when letters were mailed to each other makes me smile!
When this pandemic blows over, and it will, one day, I would suggest going back in time to the courtship of the Romantic period and experience this beautiful uncovering of what can become love.
History is now. The Romantic Revolution has returned…and it was brought in a 120 nm particle.